tsarbucks:

tehlofflies:

tsarbucks:

you know when i die i’ll probably just be in the afterlife blogging like 

"heaven has no free wi-fi? fuck this shit i’m going to hell"

how do you know hell has wifi

satan owes me several favors

(via bastille)

snorlaxatives:

why the fuck does everyone in the purge movies want to kill people if crime was legal i’d find a way to erase my student debt and also probably steal a bunch of new clothes

(via hemmogram)

richard-sp8-jr:

when i was in kindergarten i had this babysitter who cooked the best steak i’d ever had and i’d always ask what it was and she said “people” every time and i’d laugh and ask what it really was and she’d just reply “people” and i found out in first grade that she got arrested and was sentenced to 50 years-life in prison

and that’s the story about how my babysitter was basically hannibal lecter and i was will graham for a whole year

(Source: jumpingjaverts, via bastille)